Our newsletter today explores the better halves of the KC Guyz, where we rank the wives and girlfriends of each person’s starting QB.
Before we dive in, huge shoutout to Andrew Norton for not alerting Travis that his WR DJ Moore was Out in their matchup. Norton may place a Nice Guy on TV, but this guy is a shark.
Also, shoutout to Ryan Zisman for ranking atop the KC Guyz, like he does every year, despite taking the worst draft pick and not spending a dollar of his original faab. You are a beacon of excellence and inspire us all.
Ranking the WAGs of the starting QB’s of the KC Guyz
*As a reminder to readers, the tiers are not to be read left to right. This publication randomized the WAGs within each tier.
S Tier: Elite WAG
Olivia Ponton, WAG of Joe Burrow | John Gilmore, JeanHe Gets Us
- Two-time Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model.
- Modeled for major brands including SKIMS, Ralph Lauren, Steve Madden, Juicy Couture.
- Uses her platform for ocean and beach conservation.
Jenna Purdy, WAG of Brock Burdy | Andrew Norton, Champions Adapt
- Division I volleyball player.
- College Sweetheart to husband Brock.
- Keeps private as a (soon to be) mother of two.
Marissa Lawrence, WAG of Trevor Lawrence | Spencer Mobley, Ring Ring
- Childhood best friend and high school sweetheart to now husband, Trevor Lawrence.
- College soccer player
- Philanthropic focus on children from military families
Britney Mahomes, WAG of Patrick Mahomes | Collin Green, Rambo
- Professional soccer player before moving into fitness and business.
- Co-owner of the Kansas City Current.
- High school sweetheart of Patrick Mahomes.
- Sports Illustrated model.
Marissa Ayers, WAG of Jackson Dart | Connor Lamb, The Show
- Built a social platform with over 1.5 million TikTok followers
- Résumé includes gymnastics, cheerleading, modeling.
- Had her runway debut during Miami Swim Week.
Jamie Taylor, WAG of Lamar Jackson | Matt O’Neil, Vorpal Sword
- The Jacksons keep a very private personal life. In a world constant with news and cameras, we respect her ability to keep out of the public sphere.
Ann Michael Maye, WAG of Drake Maye | Jordan Bosch, Bijan 3:16
- Started dating husband Brock when they were 12-years old.
- Created baking content, including her viral “Bakemas” series.
- Graduated with a business administration degree.
Kelly Stafford, WAG of Matthew Stafford | Travis Cotton, God’s Got Me
- Registered nurse
- Former University of Georgia cheerleader
- Podcast personality, host of The Morning After
Hailee Steinfeld, WAG of Josh Allen | Ryan Zisman, FSB Zuggernauts
- Oscar-nominated actress for her role in True Grit.
- Female Lead from the live action adaptation of Ender’s Game, Zisman’s favorite book.
- Pop Singer of songs like Starving with over 1-billion streams.
- Superhero.
B Tier: Hammies and Willies
Hamstring Strain, always by the side of Caleb Williams | Sam Arends, Trips Right, Set, Hike
- Williams has no known WAG.
- His hamstring is known for being clingy and high-maintenance
- Signs suggest a short-term relationship
C Tier: College Teammates
Marvin Harrison Jr, teammate to CJ Stroud | Chris Warhman, Daddy Wahrbucks
- CJ Stroud has no known WAG.
- After reuniting with college teammate MHJ, Stroud referred to him as “a smart kid.”
D Tier: Doomed by CoD
Call of Duty, distraction to Kyler Murray | Trey Kennedy, Kennedy Klap
- Murray has no known WAG.
- With Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 4 set to release later this week, we aren’t sure if Kennedy will keep Kyler or drop him before the QBR dip.
