Week 8 Newsletter
As we bid adieu to week 8, it’s time to shine a spotlight on the underachievers among us. A blind man could see that the hapless Matthew O’Neil, wallowing in the depths of last place at a measly 1-7, has been the very definition of fantasy futility. This season, the mastermind behind the Florida Men decided to hitch his wagon to the Miami Dolphins, loading up on Tua Tagovailoa, Jaylen Waddle, Jason Sanders, and the Dolphins’ DEF. But alas, despite the Dolphins setting the NFL ablaze with their offense, it appears that O’Neils’ fantasy team missed the memo on how to transform real-world dominance into fantasy fame.
In this riveting newsletter, we delve deep into the annals of our league’s history to dissect just how bad the Florida Men truly are and to find the worst teams of all time.
As seasoned fantasy veterans, we understand that the indication of a bad team isn’t solely determined by their Points For, but rather by their Percentage Below Average (PBA). The PBA is our secret stat, allowing us to impartially evaluate teams across seasons, stripping away the variables of unique season settings and league size.
Lo and behold, the revelation! O’Neil, despite his woeful record, is merely the third-worst in the league’s checkered history. There is yet hope for his Florida Men who wants us to know that:
This too shall pass.
He went on to comment:
But for real. I don’t care too much about this year since Travis is fucking starting at TE on the IR so this league’s legitimacy is up in the air.
And while Chris Wahrman might have suffered a humiliating Toilet Bowl defeat in 2021, he somehow dodges the ignominious distinction of ranking among the top 5 worst teams of all time. Perhaps even more bewildering, Collin Green, who’s never tasted the sweet nectar of a winning season, manages to evade the dreaded top 10 entirely. Join us in unraveling the enigmatic journey of Green, whom some consider the Cinderella Story of the Year, in this exclusive interview:
It is with great honor that I never had a winning season up to this year because I didn’t have God on my side. Now that I have taken upon myself the spirit of adoption, God is on my side. I was also not married or newly married in the past few years, so I never had time for fantasy unlike some in this pitiful league.
Check out the all-time worst teams in the chart below, as we unveil the duds who have reached the nadir of the ne’er-do-wells.
Top Ten Worst All Time
| Worst All Time Rank | Owner | Season | Percentage Below Average |
| 10 | Connor Lamb | 2020 | 7.29% |
| 9 | Christopher Wahrman | 2020 | 7.74% |
| 8 | Spencer Mobley | 2022 | 8.11% |
| 7 | Christopher Wahrman | 2021 | 8.17% |
| 6 | Aaron VanWormer | 2021 | 10.87% |
| 5 | Trey Kennedy | 2020 | 11.94% |
| 4 | Zane Callister | 2021 | 13.23% |
| 3 | Matthew O’Neil | 2023 | 14.78% |
| 2 | John Gilmore | 2020 | 15.54% |
| 1 | Trey Kennedy | 2022 | 16.23% |
Thank you,
Office of the Commissioner
KC Guyz 